My Proven Weight Loss Tip

In my years of being a Trainer, the proven weight loss tip I’ve ever learnt and applied was,

“Chew your food mindfully in peace and quiet,
until it turns to liquid before you swallow”.

In doing so, each organ in your body carries out its designated role in the eating & digestion process.  The mouth for chewing & savoring the taste of your food, the stomach for breaking down chewed particles, the small intestine for absorption of nutrients & minerals, and the large intestine for releasing the waste.

In slowing our chewing, not only do we create time to enjoy our meal, appreciate what nutrition we’ve chosen to nourish our bodies with, the earth it has grown in. We also give our stomach the time it needs to tell our brain that it feels satiated, which means we’ve eaten enough.  Therefore we don’t over eat more than is needed.  We don’t receive this message way past having already eaten everything on our plates.  We are often conditioned to eat everything that’s on our plate, despite our bodies telling us we’re full.

In listening to our bodies feelings of fullness, we also get to eliminate some digestive programs that occur from not chewing our food correctly.  Leaky gut, constipation, acid re flux, gas, bloating, burping, abdominal pain, indigestion to name a few.

Because I changed how I chewed my food, my meal portions dropped, my tummy felt less bloated, and I dropped excess weight.  I was no longer eating more than I needed, and was able to shed additional kilos my body was holding onto.

This simple change is easier than trying to change many dietary things at once.”My Proven Weight Loss Tip

Heidi Firth is a Personal Trainer, Transpersonal Coach & Energy Healer.
Her passion is to inspire others to connect with their inner wisdom, their Inner Guru.

www.heidifirth.com
https://www.facebook.com/be.your.own.guru.worldwide/
https://www.instagram.com/be.your.own.guru/

 

How do I heal my Inner Child?

There hasn’t been much inspiration for blogging recently, I’ve been knee deep in emotional healing, loving my Inner Child, much to the disappointment of my inner ‘get things done’ self.  Apparently now is a time of deep inner healing, as reflected to me by my healer friend.

There’s been resistance with the acceptance of this, I mean, I am in the perfect place to be healing, but seriously, how long does one have to heal for – can I get on with the show already? Am I right?

It feels as though this year has been relentless in the pursuit of healing. The whole of 2016! In numerology this year is a 9 year, a year of endings. 2+0+1+6=9. Representing the ending of a 8/9 year cycle, and I tell you what, these numbers aren’t lying.  This last year feels like it has been dying a slow death, like the transition of seasons from fall to winter – but longer.

After spending 8.5 months in a Silent Retreat, 2.5 in Ubud – I feel like physically, I have not achieved one thing. Sure, there may be a few blog posts to show, pages and pages of scribbled journaling’s – most of which are ash by now.  I have 2 suitcases filled with my belongings & have accumulated one beautiful gifted wooden Ganesha representative of destroying my obstacles.  Sounds like a pretty clean simple year no?

Internally it looks like the Sahara desert, intuitively I feel endless rolling hills of cleared debris & destruction.  You can’t see my inner landscape, I can’t prove to you how much inner work I’ve done. We cannot sit and compare notes and graphs about who’s inner work is going to have the biggest return on investment, because this shit can’t be seen. When times like this in life present, (and yes I say times like this, as this isn’t the first time I’ve experienced this), it is so easy to forget that life exists outside of the inner destruction that has occurred.

I forget that there IS a life of dreams and desires, of the world’s greatest riches. I forget that there are manifestations of unknown awaiting my rebirth into the world. I forget that there is a sea of possibility just begging me to grab a hold of it with both hands. I forget that I am a valued being on this planet and another voice for Mother Earth. I forget. I am lost in my inner Star Wars Movie – the battle of the dark side against the light.

how do I heal?

This recent battle is just about over. One that has invited my inner teenager with all her wounds, aches and pains. I was gifted a beautiful encounter with a gorgeous Balinese Man who’s smile was enough to make my heart melt, and it pretty much did. It has been about one full year since anyone had looked at me, so to feel my butterflies dance in my tummy was a strange, but exciting feeling – I decided to explore it. Why not?

Edges were met & my fears emerged, I didn’t know whether to let the whole thing go and continue to protect my precious heart, or to open and expand despite these fears. A trip back to the Silent Retreat and a deep dig towards some inner courage saw me return to Ubud lighter and ready to explore.

My heart was opened again and I felt as vulnerable as a fresh teenager rich with new hormones. She was out in full force. The beauty of this relationship was a test of this vulnerable part of myself – would she seek fulfillment in another, or would I (adult Heidi) rise to the challenge and be there to catch her – to meet her needs.

Heart open, arms wide, I was there to catch her, there could be no other way, because he was not available, nor is it his job. His heart closed, encased behind walls of hurt & pain. She kicked & screamed and yelled at me for love, so show up for her did. Time spent laying on my bed, holding my heart, tears streaming, journaling & meditation to hold her tightly was all I could do from going crazy thinking about him.

An external force brought into my world to make me show up stronger than I ever have for myself.  It’s been a good month of parenting myself, it has been wild & relentless. I am SO thankful to see who I am and understand how to care for me, to not throw myself at another in the vain ‘hope’ that he will give me what I needed to give myself.

The relationship has come to a close, and I am feeling a little more settled within my heart, aware of new lessons on the cusp. Trust & Intimacy… This inner work, really is akin to work – seriously! If there was a way to be paid for it, I would be onto the winning ticket.

Our relationships really are nothing but mirrors for us. Showing up to teach us the deepest parts of ourselves we have not yet met. It takes courage to engage in conscious relationships – that shit ain’t easy.

“the road can teach you how to love and let go,
it can be lonely, but it’s the only thing, that we’ve ever known…”

Wash It Away
Nahko Bear

> If you’re needing support in gaining clarity around your Inner Child within relationships, contact me at me@heidifirth.com or Be Your Own Guru – Worldwide on Facebook.

Not having a Dad has become my greatest gift

Neils’ Dad has been here visiting for the weekend.  He lives in Campellville, Ontario.

I’ve met him twice before when Neil & I visited for Christmas & the packing down of his Mothers’ Condo in Milton.

He’s a lovely man, a real Dad type.  I guess what other type is there really?  I think I mean that he’s what I imagined a Dad to be like?

I never met my Dad, or ever had a Dad figure in my life.

I’ve learnt that it’s no small thing to have never met your Father, whether you’re a Male or a Female.  Both positions can leave a firm imprint on any Adult during their childhood.  For me, I didn’t know that not having a Father was a different way to grow up, until I got to school.  I succinctly remember being in the playground at 5 years of age, and all the other kids were talking about their Dads.  One of them asked me about mine, I replied “I don’t have one.”  In that moment, at my tender age of 5, I felt a distinct separation from me and them, the other kids.  I took on that there must been something wrong with me, for me to not have a Dad.  Huge Moment.  Huge belief set in place.

That untrue belief, from my innocent mind, set the scene for my life.  “There must be something wrong with me.”

I went on to create a life that set me apart from the rest.  Thinking that I was different from others.

I believe that this incident + running from the pain of Sexual Abuse, has seen me roam the world in search of myself. I wouldn’t have said it at the time, but I guess I was seeking something outside of myself, only to be brought back to myself.  Much like The Alchemist story.  At 20 years old, I sure as hell wasn’t ready to look within.  Years of establishing this belief had become my truth.
I had inner dialogues running of; I’m not worthy, there’s something wrong with me, and nobody loves me.

I ran to binge drinking, crazy partying, pill popping… this eventually turned into obsessive exercise/gym habits, a body building competition, & elimination diets & restrictive eating.  I eventually crashed.  This coincided with delving into myself during a Vision Quest that was a part of my Life Coaching Diploma.  I landed depressed for 2.5 years and had no where to turn, but to myself.  Those days were extremely dark & tough going – I didn’t know if I was going to make it through.  I would dream of not being here, not being a burden to anyone. Though they were shit, I wouldn’t take them back.  I’m a richer, loving, more compassionate person because of coming back to myself.

Not all absent Dad stories are the same.  This one is mine.  It has seen me on a journey of transformation.  Of coming back to who I innately am.  This is all there is.  To know who you are at your core is priceless.  I feel like I have finally arrived at a place where I am me.  Who I was born to be in this world.  I am connected to Source daily & am guided, step by step to take my path of purpose.  I need nothing else.

I now do not feel sad for the Father I never knew, I don’t feel angry towards Steve for what he did.  I look at the upbringing I had with deep gratitude.  I remember my Life Coach said that one day I would be grateful for my pain, and see it as a gift.  I understood it intellectually then, but now feel it as truth.

The anger & pain that I held onto, unconsciously, for years has been greatly released.  I am free from digestive issues, I am free from anxiety & fear based ways of being.  I am free to make decisions lead by my heart and choose a life of freedom.

There is no greater gift than FREEDOM!!  Freedom has been my life mantra, now I feel I embody it, rather than chase it.  Ah ho!

Should I meet my Father
Neil & his Dad

Soul-Full Sundays Interview

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In a forum recently, the lovely Carrie, of carriehensley.com asked for volunteers for her popular Sunday Soul-Full Series.

I put my hand up at the opportunity to share my message…

Read the post here.

 

 

 

 

 

Choosing a life with 0% alcohol in the name of GREATNESS

 

Drugs and Alcohol.

Most people in todays’ day are familiar with them and are likely to have tried either/or, or both.

Since my teenage years I have known alcohol only to well.

I was raised in New Zealand.  A small country where it is seen as ‘normal’ to have alcohol as part of your lifestyle.  It was not at all uncommon to have a fully stocked beer fridge at all times, just in case that impromptu guest happened to drop by, and to seal the evening with a couple of bevies.  Steve, Mums partner during the time of my childhood even made home brew – so the house was never short of alcohol.

All occasions consisted of the family gathering at someones home, bringing along their share of cans for the day or evening.  It was normal.  Like food is for survival.  Alcohol is for socializing.

Like the lives of most typical teenagers – there in consists of announcements of house parties most weekends. Alcohol is a very prominent part of a party – and so like adults, like children, you take your desired beverage for consumption to said school house party.

I always felt pretty lucky, as Mum would always purchase my alcohol for me despite being under age.  A lot of friends had to ask older kids with fake I.Ds to buy theirs.

Fast forward some 23 years later why am I bringing this discussion up?

As I review my 23 years of consuming alcohol, I have reflected on why.  Why do/did I drink this stuff that makes me feel foggy headed, and crap the next day, if not subsequent days.

During my London days I could drink until the wee hours of the morning, and get up the next day to continue the game again.  Good ole 2o’s!

It’s only now sitting on the other side of this time, having learnt invaluable life lessons that I can completely understand why I did it.

In my understanding – Alcohol is a form of escapism.  Of not accepting parts of ourselves we want to happily keep hidden.  Alcohol allows us to feel more socially accepted, allows us to escape our anxiety, or awkwardness and insecurities.  As soon as we have a few drinks, we can feel more relaxed, unwind and at ease with the world around us.

Alcohol can sometimes allow us to be the person we really wish we could be, by eliminating our inhibitions.  But allowing us to open up.  Say the things we wish we could say when we’re sober.  Be funny.  Be bold.  Be uninhibited.  It is a drink of courage that makes us feel more powerful and successful, more self accepting.  That is until it wears off and reality settles in again.

I experienced all of this.  I would drink to excess.  I did not like myself, and was hiding from this pain.

Sometimes I would have two on the go at one time.  We used to have a rule that you couldn’t be double parked, and if you were, it was an automatic cause to skull one of your drinks.

2001 – I arrived in Sydney, Australia after my 2.5 years as a backpacker through London & Europe.  I was known as Heidi – the mullet party girl backpacker.  I was fortunate to land on my feet when I arrived in Aussie.  One of my London buddies, lived in a massive heritage listed house in North Sydney.  There was plenty of room for me in her lounge to stay, until I figured out my next move.

One night, all 4 flatmates of the house, including myself and some friends partook in a weekly ‘Doohat Dinner’.  We gathered and shared a meal and drinks together.  One of the flatmates Jaysin and I, were going drink for drink with each other.  He was making mine, and without a doubt was stitching me up.  I’m sure he was making mine half vodka, half mixer!  After dinner we decided to go out to a local bar down the road.  I remember stumbling down the road, the night air making me more drunk each step I took.  My head was spinning, yet I was determined to charge on.  I had a persona to uphold.  I believe I made it to the entrance of the bar, but struggled to hold myself up.  Nicola – another flatmate – thought it best I turn around and head on back home, so took it upon herself to walk me.  She put me to my bed in the lounge, with a bucket in hand, and wished me goodnight.  I remember that bucket became a valued companion that night.  This is one story of many.

Alcohol dulls our senses and gives us a false sense of ourselves.  It diminishes our bodies ability to process thoughts and energy.  It puts us in a lower state of vibration and invites in lower vibrating energies.  Negativity, Paranoia, Anger, Frustration to name a few.

As I continue along my spiritual journey of consciousness expansion, the more I become a sensitive – energetic being, and the more I do not resonate with drugs & alcohol.  I feel these toxins in other people, and when I partake in a drink or two – I feel a diminished vibrancy, expansion & aliveness.

Up until this morning, I have been somewhat happy to drink the odd drink here and there, and accept that this is normal.  Well, normal in the sense that if I do it, I will fit it.  If I don’t, then what??

Today I’m making the decision to cross into the ‘then what’ space.

I acknowledge that I no longer need alcohol in my life.  I am no longer hiding from who I am.  I do not need it to feel comfortable with myself.  I do not need it to have a good time.  I certainly do not need it to fit in.  I have decided to eliminate alcohol from my life.  And it’s not that I’m a big drinker anyway, so this doesn’t feel like a big thing.  It’s just that I am recognizing that I do not want this in my life anymore.  I am giving myself permission to own my power, vibrancy, aliveness in its wholeness!

I am choosing to feel good.  All the time.   I do the work.  I derseve to give this to myself.  I take personal responsibility for my health and wellbeing.  I do not want lower vibrating energies feeding off me.

Anxiety, depression, negativity are lower vibing qualities that don’t support striving towards a place of greatness in my life.

I am currently feeling unsatisfied in my life and I am the only person who can choose to change this.  I want AMAZING for my life!  I want to awake, feeling excited and in wonder & awe of life.  Not to know it, but to feel it. Every god darn day!

Feeling good is a choice, one that we all have.  We can all take steps, baby if need to be, eliminate negativity and lower vibing from around us.

I had this conversation with Neil this morning.  I told him that I have the power to choose what I want, and want I don’t want.  I told him that I don’t want drugs and alcohol in my life.  This invites him to choose what he wants.  If he chooses drugs and alcohol – he looses me.  Its as simple as that.  The choices we need to make might not be pretty – but this is why it takes courage to create the life we want to live!

In the home today it is a blurry state of acceptance and sorrydom as the haze of hangoverness sleeps.  The words have been spoken, and are awaiting rest.  The next few days will show the results of change, and what will unfold.

I eagerly await the rise of the new, from the old.

 

my alcohol free life

What is my life purpose?

Today I answered a bunch of questions for a fellow Amazing Life + Biz Academy Member, for the opportunity to be featured on her blog as part of her Soul-Full Sunday Interviews.  I have just read one of Carries’ blog posts, and it appears we are both Sexual Abuse thrivers.    I use the description thrive, as Survivor does not feel like a fit for me anymore.

I feel that I now THRIVE, that my story is simply that, something that shaped me into the amazing woman I have become in the world today.  I no longer resonate with that story, however I still wish to share parts of it, as I wish to show other women that there is a way forward from the darkness of your secret.

I share these answers with you, as I shared them with Carrie, as there is a message to be heard.  A message of inspiration.  Showing another way for women who have experienced the pain that abuse can cause.

It is time to rise up into the being that you are here to be in this world.  It is time.

 

How are you following your life path (dharma)?
In each moment I am aware of who I’m choosing to be in the world. I try to make sure that I am present with each & every person I come into contact with. I take personal responsibility for my body & being and trust by doing so, that I teach others that it is possible for them also.
I recently started working at lululemon athletica here in Canada. I love that the girls I’m working with thought that I was 26! I’m actually 36 and ½! I feel like that’s a pretty awesome testament to me!

Have you always had this calling? If not, was it a sudden/gradual shift?
I believe I have. I fit into that known story of not fitting in at school. My story begun with learning I didn’t have a Dad at the age of 5, then at the age of 8 – was sexually abused by my Mums boyfriend. I took on the beliefs that I wasn’t good enough to have a Dad & in the second example – shut down my emotions as I didn’t know how to deal with the situation.

It’s only in hindsight I see that I spent my teens & early 20’s ‘running’ from myself. I left my home country of New Zealand at the age of 20, from here life was hard and fast. I partied hard, engaged in recreational drugs, exercised like a mad woman & was determined my body defined how I felt about myself.
I entered a body building competition in 2006 – I spent 1 year working towards that goal. After competition & a Vision Quest I completed as part of my Life Coaching studies, my world fell apart.
This intention of my quest was ‘to shine’, I went through a very dark knight of the soul with depression for 2.5 years. This forced me to acknowledge the pain that I’d kept hidden from my childhood that I had been running from.
As I pulled through – I learnt that there was so much wonder & beauty in the world. I knew I had a purpose in this life that involved inspiring others to heal from their pain.

What did you have to give up by honoring your path?
I’ve let go of a lot!
Fear, Doubt, Worry, Anxiety, Pain, Lack…
I’d say in aligning to something greater that feels good, I’ve chosen to let go of the things that haven’t supported me feeling good.
This might look like; big nights out, binge drinking, recreational drugs, gossip, TV, reading Newspapers/Magazines, eating processed foods, sugar, non organic meat, obsessive exercise habits…
The physical things I mentioned just fell away as I changed. It wasn’t about letting go of them because I thought I needed to. It’s was about aligning to something greater, about making the CHOICE to FEEL good. To feel GREAT.

What have you learned/gained by remembering your true nature (honoring your path)?
That I am unlimited… I have everything that I could ever need, in this moment & every moment. All I need to do is align to the vibration of what I want, and I will attract what I need, or the steps to move closer towards attracting what I need.

That it is an absolute CHOICE to feel good. It doesn’t just happen, it is something that you need to work at. Chose to eat healthy nutritional food, chose healthy movement habits, choice healthy work & social environments, chose healthy thoughts…

What is one thing you do every week to honor your innermost authentic Self (connection to Source)?
I do a lot of things. I LOVE nature…. I will take time out and visit the local woods and breathe, probably even hug & talk to the trees there.
I will watch the insects and birds & notice how they might invite me in & let each other know that I’m there.

I meditate daily. I give thanks to Great Spirit and acknowledge its existence.

What is one treat you can share with us to bring along on our own path towards freedom?
Oh SO many…. But one.
Um, I would invite you to observe your mind.
Watch your thoughts.
Sit in quiet contemplation, or meditation and observe.
Or, if you don’t feel ready (yet), to start. Journal.
Write. Write. Write.
Write unedited on a blank sheet of paper. Just allow anything that enters your mind to be expressed onto that sheet. Give yourself 20 minutes of pure uninterrupted time to express your minds thoughts.

What is my life purpose?

If you follow this one step, you’ll have motivation to exercise for LIFE

I don’t like to tell you, the reader, how to live your life.finding motivation to train

Do this, or do that, and you will get xyz.

There are enough ‘GURUs’ and blog sites out there, that will tell you your ‘5 Steps to your dream life’ or ’10 steps to a healthier you’.

Your task, if you choose to accept, is to find your own personal key, so that you can connect to your internal life manual and;

PERSONALLY ANSWER EVERY QUESTION YOU HAVE EVER ASKED!

Back in the day, I operated my life – pretty disconnected from my body, which is kinda funny considering I was worked as a Personal Trainer.

I was head down, bum up, and heading full speed in which ever direction I was facing.

I got shit done, but there was not a lot of balance within the rest of my life.

I thought I was in control, but turns out, I controlled my external life, as a means to feel in control, of an internal world that I was totally out of control with.

My thoughts about myself and food were my main two culprits.
– How I felt about myself.
– How I felt about myself when I ate.

As these thoughts were always forefront, there was often not much room for anything else.

These thoughts drove my life.  How I felt about myself, dictated the amount of exercise I’d do.  How I’d eat, dictated how I felt about myself, and how I controlled or binged.  If I binged, then I had to balance that activity out with more exercise, and so, I was trapped in this cycle that was relentless.

At the time, I thought this was completely normal.  I fit into the Personal Trainer mold, who cared overtly about what she ate, and how she exercised.  I even competed in a Womens Body Building Competition which was the perfect hideout for all of my inner demons to work their magic.  I found preparing for the competition easy in a sense, as I operated from my mind and my behaviors, I wasn’t at all connected to how I actually felt about things.

The relentless exercising and strict eating = I didn’t feel it.
Who I was being in relation to my partner = no idea.
When I injured my shoulder = barely skipped a beat.

Though I’ve noticed this way of being, this type of behavior, has come to be modus operandom or ‘normal’ for a great many people today.

Whether it is a body building competition, or copying the habits of your latest Instagram fitness Guru/s, we live in a world where we have become SO focused on our external environments as a means to making us feel good!

But underneath it all.  The thoughts, food & rigorous exercising, what is really going on?

Often at the core, there is a the lonely, sad, deep need of ours for love and acknowledgement.

It might look different, or slightly similar per individual.

This is the part that drives us.  That drives our need to eat a certain way, to follow a particular exercise trend.

We believe that if we look a certain way, then we’ll be accepted, and we will be loved.  Well, this was my story – the one that was my pilot to my vehicle.

This pilot (inner self), within our vehicle, (body), is what is driving our habits and ways of living.

What we want in life, is dictated by this inner self.

After my competition, I had worked SO hard towards that goal, that slowly as the weeks unfolded, I lost focus.  Of course I was still attentive to my physic, however I no longer had that finish line to strive for.

I slowly kept up with my training, but something deep within me was stirring.

It sat deep within my belly, I put it down to the amount of bread & junk food I was now giving myself permission to consume post competition.  I continued on with my workouts and 80:20 strict eating

A heaviness was growing within me.

Back then I was oblivious to my inner world, and so the ‘strength’ I knew, was to keep pushing through.

I pushed with my workouts.  I pushed with my work.  I pushed with current clients.  I pushed hard in every area of my life.

One by one, my clients began to let go of my services.

My income started to dwindle.

No matter how I tried to conjure up more sessions, it seemed nothing was working for me.

My business partner called a meeting to invite my separation from co-ownership, as she was witnessing my struggle.

I was putting on weight from my increased binges & lack of drive to balance it with intense exercise.

My motivation started waning.

My external world was crumbing and falling apart as I knew it.

And I too was falling apart on the inside, like the World Trade Centre.

I had no idea what was happening to me.

My self esteem was deflating.

I was lost and suffering.

It was somewhere around here, that I begun to regularly meditate.

I had meditated previously, but didn’t have what you would call a regular practice.

Step by step, I began to connect in with my inner world.  My inner self.  My pilot.

She was like a long lost part of me that I had cast aside in a cupboard and thrown away the key.

One can imagine how someone who had been in a cupboard may feel.

She had created the breaking down of my external environment to get my attention to come within to myself.

I now needed to build my relationship with her, and re-create a life that included her in it, not separate to.

My story continues on and on from here…

 

“A life lived in disconnection from our inner selves, is one that does not include our whole essence.  Is one that misses a deep resonance with life & its meaning.  To live and not feel our darkest lows and our highest highs escapes the wonder and magnificence that is being human. Being out of alignment with our inner world, skips wonderous magic that curves the tapestry of our lives… A life without moments of being, is not a life lived at all.  To miss the magic that is our essence, and arrive at the end, is a very very unfortunate realization to wake up too.

I invite the wonder in you, to rise up and challenge the wonder in all of humanity.  Give space to your truth, dive deep, and hold still the rich vastness that is you.  Breathe in your magic and unlock the gates of mystery.  Peace & Love are within us all.  The time is now to rise and uprise”.

 

There are literally THOUSANDS of Meditations on the internet at this wonderful time in our lives.  Why not head over to YouTube and search for one you like.  As a suggestion, try an Inner Child meditation, to support in your connection with him or her.   Here’s a few by one of my favorites, Louise Hay to get you started.

Should you need support in working with your connection to your Inner Child, and anything that arises, please feel free to reach out to me.
I am currently available for One on One sessions.

Heidi
Phone: +1 778-679-6727
Skype: heidi.firth

That awkward moment when you share what you’re really thinking…

Journaling has been one of the most useful TOOLS I have used over the past 10 years to support me in gaining clarity & understanding through challenging times.

In the beginning, it was the one place I could go to be totally unedited, 100% ME…

I would write anything I wanted, and express my deepest pains, fears, joys, confusion.

In a bid to gain clarity yesterday, here are the words I wrote, and the conversation I had with myself…

I share these with you to show you that we are all working life out, figuring out the journey and feeling tough stuff…

Journal share – 12 April 2015

I feel like I’m dismantling. Falling apart. Disassembling. Every thought seems old and untrue. It is an old framework that is breaking down in order to rebuild anew I dreamt I was in an old house/chateau last night that was doing just this, falling apart from the inside. I managed to escape from inside of it, to run and tell the others. They got on auto emergency fix it to try to repair the inner foundations. But I think it was already to far gone.
I feel like this.
It is ok.
But it is also a slight challenge. I feel like falling apart. I feel on the verge of a breakdown/breakthrough. My body aches and I think is trying to find its new configuration. The pain in my body has become a 6-7 out of 10. Neil did an amazing job of massaging it yesterday. It feels different, but a bit bruised. In my mind/world I seem to not be happy with anything. Like it doesn’t fit anymore I am aware of being ready for a new way of being. Maybe more lightness. More open. More love. I wrote open without being conscious of that. More creative. More fun. More flowing with each passing moment. There are hints of this one the horizon. Just at arms reach. Sounds like a BIG transformation.
By when do I feel this will be complete. 5 days. In time for the new moon 🙂
Life will feel NEW.
INTERESTING and an adventure again.

But for now?
Keep practicing self care. love, being. grounded. nature. meditation. earth. nature.
The things I know. 

I please ask that if you are feeling drawn to reach out and comfort me, I invite you to check in with yourself, and ask how you need to comfort YOU. We are all mirrors for one another.

I am well, and being comforted wholey and fully by myself.

With love. Always

journal writing for mental clarity
My writing expressions

 

Poo, farts & gluten intolerance…

poo, farts & gluten intolerance
What does yours look like?

Poo, farts & Gluten Intolerance…

Do you have issues with any of these;
+ Dealing with any of the line up in the image to your right
+ Feeling uncomfortable tension inside your gut & intestines – giving you that constant sense of bloat
+ Being that person at dinners out who has to ensure there is no Gluten in any of the dishes.

Does your stomach bloat at the very smell of bread?

Are you all to familiar with any or all of the above?

Does your poop look like any of the images except Number 7?

Well, I’m here to say, that it doesn’t need to be this way!  No-siree-bob!

I’ve been there, done that.  And I’m out on the other end, living with Number 7 once to twice a day, and life feels great!

Obviously it wasn’t always this way, otherwise this blog post wouldn’t exist.

It took me a good 1.5 years to transform what needed to shift in order to align to my path of power.

So I want to yell from the rooftops, that you can do it too!

It all started with diet eliminations.  The first being when I removed all forms of processed foods, sugars, carbohydrates from my diet in preparation for my first Womens Figure Body Building Competition.

This opened up a whole world of awareness for me.  How food affected my energy, well-being and my gut.  I learnt very quickly that eating bread for me at the time, made me sluggish, bloated & totally uncomfortable.

I put myself on a Gluten Intolerant diet, and that was that.  I must’ve followed that for 4 years, not thinking anything of it.  As Gluten free diets are ‘normal’ in our world today.

It was during this time, that one week I had an ache in the side of my torso that would not release.  I knew going to a Doctor wouldn’t be my way forward, so I asked Spirit to guide me to someone who could.  After a week, I found myself walking past a Traditional Chinese Medicine Clinic and was guided to walk in.

The rest is history, but now on the other side of this journey – I can see how I absolutely needed to address some home truths about what was being held in my beautiful body, and how addressing them, transformed my health and well being, beyond what simply a change in diet could.  A change in diet was part of mine, as was the exploration of stored unprocessed emotions and old beliefs held within my physical body & mindset.

Transformation happens when all layers & levels of being are addressed.  Physical, mental and emotional.

When they are, the result is beyond what one could imagine prior to the journey.

I now offer packages that support individuals embarking on the healing of their digestive issues that will see them right through to the stage of completion and transformation.

Ongoing support is recommended for the changes and emotions that arise for individuals.

These sessions are available by Skype and Distance Healings.  One on One sessions are available if you live in Victoria, BC, Canada.

Contact me at me@heidifirth.com, or ask your questions in the comments section below…

Sending so much love to your soul & beautiful digestive system within these words. <3

What I did after my partners Mother died

I am drawn to write about an interesting topic, I can’t say I’ve seen to much written on.

How do you deal/cope/work with, your partner, when he or she is dealing with the loss of a parent, or loved one?

This is coming up for me in my life right now, and I have reached a conclusion that I’m comfortable with, but thought it might be interesting to start a conversation.

My partner has been dealing with the loss of his Mother.

She passed away so suddenly, 65 years young, on 25 August 2014, not to long before I moved to Canada.

He has been the sole Executor of her Estate.  Dealing with everything from the sale of her house, sale of her car, all of her finances, every single belonging in her home – including all photo albums, even down to his old baby clothing and toys.  Everything.

It has only really been 2-3 weeks since we returned from Ontario, packing up all her possessions and shipping them back here to British Columbia.  That is 7 months that he has been responsible for ALL of the above duties.  7 Months!  Where is his time to grieve within that?

He has dealt with a niggly cough and a runny nose here and there, but really…

What does grief look like?  Does it have a structure, and shape?  I’m pretty positive it doesn’t.

Then it is only understandable his recent behavior and who he is choosing to be right now.

The past few weekends he has had fairly huge nights out with the boys, ending with a night on the couch, either here or at a friends.  There have been long working days, facebook & internet trawling during non business hours, the odd snappy comment, all disbursed amoungst the odd moment of being.  When these are out of reach, he is snoring wherever his head lays.

Perhaps this is grief for him?

Now, I’ve been going through my process of judging this.  Initially thinking “come on! deal with your emotions!”

Just like with my clients, I cannot have an agenda for how he chooses to deal with his.  But internally, I have had.

What comes up for me, is I miss all the beautiful interactions that I share with him, when he is present and free from his pain.  Loving intimacy, fun & laughter, joy & playfulness.  It can be easy for me to point the finger and judge him thinking; this, that, or the other isn’t happening, point my finger at him to deal with his stuff!

But this is a relationship, sometimes there will be challenging ebb & flow between joy, sadness, laughter and discomfort.

As he disappears into his world of distraction, perhaps this is an invitation for me to lean into my power and strength and support him. Loosing my agenda to what I wish for, and simply being in the moment of discomfort with him.  I have been doing this on occasion, and notice it does require strength and grande self care.  I often need to excuse myself for walks, meditation or time out when I need – this has been SO important.

I am acknowledging this more as I write.  This is not the work that returns a pat on the back, or large shinny accolade.  It is truly life and who we choose to be for each other through its various stages.

After my years of self development work, learning to love myself and take care of myself, I am only too aware how selfish this has made me. Being selfish is not a bad thing, though when it stops us from loving and caring for those around us, then we need to re-establish new patterns for being.  I think this is my current lesson.

One day the tables may turn, and I might find myself in his position, with him feeling the same way I am right now.

Life and it’s magical Ebb & Flows.

dealing-with-grief
Neil, Andrew & their Mom

 

 

How have you dealt with emotional challenges within your close relationships?  I’d LOVE to hear your experiences.

Please leave a comment below to share a discussion xx